The Ol' Switcheroo

Last Friday all four of us went out to lunch together. Michael really wanted to go to Chili's, so I conceded and we went. Anything for the kids, right? Plus, I hadn't been there in like, a week. So I was due.

Anyway, we're sitting there, Michael and I on one side of the table, and Connor and Angie on the other. Both boys had apple juice in the Chili's kids cups. Michael finished his juice off pretty quickly, and was still thirsty, and he knew where he could get his hands on some more juice. So he just grabbed Connor's cup and switched them. I think he was already taking a sip when we realized what he was up to.

Angie asks him, "Michael, what are you doing?"
"Connor wants to trade with me."
"No, give Connor his cup back."
"But he has to trade with me."
"When our waiter comes by, we'll ask him to get you some more."
"Connor, can I please have some more apple juice?"
"No, we'll ask the waiter."
"The waiter?"

At least he's too young to have figured out telling Connor to look at something behind him when trading juice cups.

We've probably got a whole week before he gets that bright idea.

Stuff I've Learned About God: Individuality Is Good

I've been a sincere Christian for most of my life, but in the not-quite three years that I've been a Dad, I've really understood God's role as Heavenly Father so much more. I certainly don't think I'm the first person to figure this stuff out, but thought this would be a good forum to share some of those things, too.


Even at 11 months, Connor's personality is really starting to show, and it's very different from his brother's. And I'm glad. Even though some of the things that "worked" with Michael don't seem to make any difference with Connor (like techniques to calm him down), I think it would be pretty disappointing if these boys were the same. Obviously their uniqueness will provide parenting challenges for us for the rest of our lives, but the positives in this situation far, far outweigh any difficulties it presents. We're dealing with two distinct individuals. And while I like discussing nature vs. nurture as much as any other subject, I'll leave that for another time.

Having unique personalities, skill sets, interests, frustrations, and more are a big part of what I'm enjoying and looking forward to as a parent. I don't want them to be the same. I want them to develop who they are, not be copies of each other ... or of me. I mean, as much as it will be cool if the three of us (or even four of us) share a common interest or two, that's really secondary to them growing as individuals. And I think that's the way God looks at us.

God not only knows we're going to be unique individuals, He created us to be that way. I'm so grateful that I'm not like anyone else, and you are grateful that no one else is like me. And because He created us to be individuals, I have to believe that He delights in our uniqueness. Certainly He wants to know us and have a relationship with us, just like I do with my boys. But He doesn't deal with us all the same way, He deals with us as the individuals He created us to be. He certainly has some consistent expectations of us, but also gives us the freedom to be unique. And I love that. God doesn't create people with distinct personalities, DNA, strengths and weaknesses, and fingerprints, then require us to all "get in line" and be identical. And as much as I appreciate my role models and mentors (ask me for a list sometime, I love to talk about them), God wants me to maximize who He made me to be, not become a carbon copy of them. And He made me to be a one-of-a-kind person who loves Him with my whole heart, just like I hope Michael and Connor will be.

So be who He made you, and realize that you make Him proud when you do.

A Couple Quick Stories

Yesterday Michael and I were playing with his action figures on his bed, and he says "Dr. Octopus needs to take a shower."
"He does?" I ask. "Is he dirty and stinky?"
"Yeah."
"Does Captain America need to take a shower?"
"No," he says with that 'you're really not that bright, are you?' kind of tone, "Captain America's not dirty and stinky."
I can't imagine there will be too many situations where I could be more proud of him.

A couple of days ago we had a fabulous family nap time, but since it took a little while for Angie to coax Connor to sleep, I got up when the boys woke up, and she kept sleeping for a little while. Connor cried a little when he first woke up, and we got out to the other room and settled onto the floor, and Michael says, "I'll wipe your tears, Connor." And he did. We can only hope that they'll like each other this much ten years from now.

"Oh no, Mom! We forgot!"

Yesterday Angie had a field trip with the students and families in her class, and had to take the boys along because, for some reason, all of our usual babysitters were unavailable on a Tuesday morning.

So they get in the car, and Michael says "Oh no, Mom! We forgot!" "Forgot what?" Angie asked. "We forgot Dad!"

So Close

The last two mornings Connor has come so close to saying "Hi Dad." It sort of comes out as "Ha Da!" But he's definitely saying it to me. So it really sounds like "Hi Dad" if that's what you're listening for.

The last couple of afternoons, shortly after my arrival home, Michael has asked "What are you making, Dad?" The first time I didn't really understand the question, 'cause I was just sitting there. "What am I making?" I asked. I didn't understand. After several follow-up questions, I realized he was asking what I was making for dinner. Last night he seemed a little surprised that I wasn't making anything, and that Angie was going to be making dinner. I've actually been thinking lately about when he goes away to college, and the kind of equipment I'm going to need to send with him so he can take take care of himself, cullinarily speaking.

Okay, so to distract you from those stories not being all that entertaining, here's a couple of new pictures that Angie took yesterday ...

Untold Tales, Part One

There are a few stories that will end up here that happened pre-blog. This is one of them. By the way, there may be some strong language in this one, so be forewarned, okay?

So we're in the middle of the whole potty training thing with Michael, right? He's still in the middle of the process, but doing pretty well.

A week ago or so he's standing in front of the toilet, pants and Spider-Man underwear casually cast aside, and he's looking down saying "C'mon pee, get out of my penis!" Over and over and over.

Good job, Dad

And so we officially launch into the stories ...

I had some problems with my Miata recently. Not the car itself, so much, as the tire went flat (punctured), and the not-quite-a-year-old battery died (mostly from a combination of a lack of driving it and Michael leaving the door slightly open). But I got a new battery, and got a new tire.

So yesterday I'm replacing the mini-spare with the new tire, and Michael is sitting out in the garage with me while I'm doing it. He did a very good job of following the directions I was giving him to keep him in safe areas, just in case the jack slipped or something. One of the lug nuts made a noise when I cranked it, and he laughed and was a little disappointed when the next one came off quietly. The whole process took, I don't know ... 15 minutes, maybe.

So when I'm all done, and I've got the car back on the ground, and I tell him I'm done and all we have left to do is put the tools away, he says "Good job fixing the car all by yourself, Dad." I'm sure he doesn't realize just how rare it is that I would fix anything on the car (replacing flat tires is very nearly the most complicated thing I would attempt).

I'm amazed, though, at how much I appreciate his affirmation.

Here They Are

Here's a couple of recent pictures, just so we all know who we're talking about.

An Introduction

I know, I know ... what the world needs is one more blog. But nobody's making you read this, right? This is to be a place for me to record fun stories about my kids, and to try to capture and communicate some of the lessons I'm learning about life, God, parenting, and other things in my role as a Dad.

At the time I'm writing this (March 8, 2005), Michael is just a few weeks shy of his third birthday, and Connor is just over a month from his first. So while I've had plenty of fun so far, I know that I'm really still near the beginning of this lifelong adventure, and wanted to have something to motivate me to preserve some of the fun stuff that happens.

I don't necessarily envision this as an absolutely every day endeavor, but intend to keep it updated pretty regularly.

And the truth is that about half of the motivation for doing this is so my boys' grandparents can hear the stories I forget to tell them on the phone.

So, thanks for checking this out.